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Posted 2012-07-12T05:52:47+02:00
How do you tell a Romney supporter from an Obama supporter? Romney supporters sign their checks on the front; Obama supporters sign them on the back.

Epic(10)
Comment by Anonymous

Barack Obama… • Never served in the military. Not even R.O.T.C. Why is he our Commander-in-Chief? • Never owned, ran or even managed a business, not even a hotdog stand. Why is he now 'CEO' of the greatest nation on earth? • Never balanced a budget or managed a payroll. Why is he in charge of the largest economy in the world? • Never was a doctor, a nurse or ever worked in any health care profession. Why is he being trusted to completely take over America's health care system? • Never was Mayor of a city, or Governor of a state, in fact, he has no executive experience whatsoever. Why is he in charge of the executive branch of the United States government? • Is a failed, corrupt 'resign or be disbarred' lawyer. Why is he trusted to appoint our, Secretary of State, Supreme Court justices and Attorney General? • Never was a success in any area of his life except campaigning and running for office (and writing two 'autobiographies' before he ever accomplished anything.) Why was he elected President of the United States of America?

Comment by Anonymous

I'm white and from an upperclass part of Chicago and I love obama..best president ever...share tge wealth..help other americans that's what america is about

Comment by Anonymous

Had to be a white ass cracka that posted this corny shit, smh. Yall wonder why u will NEVER prosper. You OPENLY put African Americans down for decades with no remorse wutsoeva. So fuk yall NOW and RUN YA POCKETS!!!! Bwahahaha

Comment by Anonymous

VOTE ME FOR PRES!! FREE LLAMAS FOR EVERYONE!

Comment by Anonymous

God I hate politics.

Comment by Anonymous

The best way to tell the difference is that Romney supporters are absolute douches.FUCK AMERICA, I AM SENDING JOBS OVERSEAS, AND HIDING MY TAX RETURNS!

Comment by Anonymous

People who receive checks: Land Lords, art dealers, auto mechanics, Traders, seniors, and welfare recipients.. does that look like a homogenous group? It's only funny when it's not stupid!!

Comment by Anonymous

People ... why are you taking everything so serious? It's only a joke! Lighten up ... have a good time ere ....LAUGH!!

Comment by Anonymous

Commenter below me: You're the one asking questions not him.. so who is clueless?

Comment by Anonymous

Commenter below me is clearly bias with absolutely no supporting facts, and just blatantly spews whatever jizz obama dribbles into their mouth. How does it feel to be clueless?

Comment by Anonymous

Still a dumb post if you ask me.. once a check is written out, someone has to sign at the back.. whether it's a Romney supporter paying for a DUI, and a Tax fine or an Obama supporter reciving money for goods sold! Next time put up posts that are clear enough..

Comment by Anonymous

VOTE ME FOR PRES!

Comment by Anonymous

One mans 'lame post' is anothers treasure ...

Comment by Anonymous

Commenter below me: is that what your momma told you to say? The one who pays your bills while you post lame shit on this site.

Comment by Anonymous

First commentor. You're right. Romney supporters keep paying their employees. They're the only ones who can provide jobs for those of us who don't want to live on Obamas handouts while we sit at home playing XBox. Like you.

Comment by Anonymous

Put obamas face on the food stamp

Comment by Anonymous

Hey first poster ... I.E. Romney supporters pay their bills ... and the bills of Obama supporters ( all the people who want their free stuff)

Comment by Anonymous

First commentator, for you, because your a simple person ... Obama appeals to all the people who want 'FREE' stuff ... entitlements .. healthcare ... welfare ...etc. Hey Baby, ain't nothin' free.

Comment by Anonymous

First commentor, you're a fuckin' idiot. I hope you don't vote.

Comment by Anonymous

True!!!! And I hope you don't mind....... I will be using this one myself!!!!!

Comment by Anonymous

haha love this one, Obama supporters are all signing their welfare checks, priceless..

Comment by Anonymous

In other words, Obama supporters get paid.. but Romney supporters keep paying... hmmmmm

Posted 2010-11-06T23:04:26+01:00
In the past, when you were angry with someone you argued with them. Now you just delete them off Facebook.

Epic(12)
Posted 2009-12-10T07:46:01+01:00
What's the difference between Santa Claus and Tiger Woods? Santa stop at 3 HOs

Funny(21)
Comment by Anonymous

POWER OUFF GIRLS look so dramatically down sydrummed

Posted 2013-09-17T21:20:45+02:00
Chinese food to go: $16.84. Gas to go get it: $1.62. Getting home and realizing they forgot one of your containers: Riceless.

Epic(12)
Comment by Anonymous

The first even slightly original status that has been posted on this in months, good job!

Comment by Anonymous

I am hungry for another status now tho...

Comment by Anonymous

HAHAHAHA YEA-aah!

Posted 2010-10-25T06:50:18+02:00
Everybody learns how to dance when they drop a knife

Epic(7)
Comment by Anonymous

hahaha thats soo true!!!! XD

Posted 2009-11-25T09:15:06+01:00
I'm an old guy. I 've 'been around', but never cease to be amazed by how tough & rude guys get when online rather than face-2-face. Example: I was winning (wasting time...) on an anonymous game site & all of the sudden, my opponent got mad at me & called me a "stupid, c**!&ukkin', stinking - sh*thead - lucky - inbred - bastard - muffugger".... ...dude, i wuz shocked... ...never been called lucky before...

Funny(20)
Posted by Leah6666 2012-03-23T16:37:11+01:00
I got robbed today at Shell. I called the cops, and they asked if I knew who did it. I said "yeah, pump 6."

Epic(11)
Comment by Anonymous

Really curious to know why you're sooo obsessed with the number 6? I actually feel like that number follows me in my life lmao..

Comment by Leah6666

waaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

Comment by Anonymous

Commenter one thats why they call it status stalker. stalk a status and repost it here or you can make one up. They should change your name to dumb ass.

Comment by Anonymous

This chic copies shit more than suthernfukr. They should change the name of the site to "Status Copy & Post"

Posted by Suthernfukr 2012-01-24T16:12:39+01:00
Im having a problem in Call Of Duty, I go to the menu and.......... alright by now the girls have stopped reading this, anyone know any good porn sites?

Epic(10)
Comment by Anonymous

I read it!!!! LMAO thats horrible! But thats actually funny!

Comment by Anonymous

hah. i actually read it. thats bad. lol.

Posted 2011-04-09T20:36:09+02:00
Sorry hun, but unlike you, I'm not a doorknob where everyone gets a turn. I'm more of a casino where only the lucky ones hit the jackpot.

Funny(10)
Comment by Lamp

Insulting anonymous people using a facebook status makes you look pretty shallow. Just so you know.

Comment by Anonymous

casino payouts are 1 in a million so more than likely you're never getting laid =)

Posted 2011-04-10T00:30:53+02:00
Don't you hate it when you miss a call by the last ring, but when you immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail? What did the person do after I didn’t answer? Drop the phone and run away?

Epic(7)
Comment by Anonymous

...maybe began dialing another number at which point in time you'd be sent to vmail without them even knowing it?

Comment by Whooooooooa

yeahhh ive seen this status before

Posted 2011-02-03T23:05:05+01:00
Why do I have to bother pushing "one" for English? I'm still going to get someone who can't speak it.

Epic(9)
Posted 2010-01-10T23:01:44+01:00
I really want to punch "The Situation" in his vagina

Funny(12)
Posted 2012-03-09T07:23:03+01:00
I've always wanted to get into a cab and yell, 'Follow that car!!!'

Funny(28)
Comment by Anonymous

I also wanna do that

Comment by Anonymous

What is with these f**king idiots reposting OLD COMMENTS like they ACTUALLY came up with them???????

Comment by Anonymous

i wanna do that to

Comment by Anonymous

comment below... EPIC

Comment by Anonymous

comment below... EPIC

Comment by Anonymous

*Reply to the posts beginning with "Yeah."* Don't take things too literally, you scrotum. In order to get to where you want to go on Cash Cab (and win money), you have to correctly answer questions. Do you realize how frustrating it would be if that didn't happen and you REALLY had to follow someone? Geez.

Comment by Anonymous

I think he was joking ya dip ;)

Comment by Anonymous

Yeah, you lost.

Comment by Anonymous

Yeah....okay. You were on Cash Cab. Uh huh. And that's relevant to this post how? Oh right, it's not.

Comment by Anonymous

I've done that. It turned out to be Cash Cab and you know how that works.

Posted by Suthernfukr 2012-02-18T18:03:05+01:00
They should have cell phone chargers in waiting rooms instead of magazines.

Epic(10)
Comment by Anonymous

you are hilarious!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Comment by Anonymous

VVVV GAY! VVVV

Comment by Anonymous

VVVVV BURRRRN! VVVV

Comment by Anonymous

Here's an idea...get off of suthernfukr's dick and then get off of the site all together. You're an asshole.

Comment by Anonymous

Here's an idea... How about dumb asses like Suthernfukr plan ahead when they go to the Infectious Disease Clinic and have a fully charged battery on their phone or bring their own damn charger with them.

Comment by Anonymous

Million dollar idea!

Comment by Anonymous

I totally agree! I thought the exact same thing while waiting for my dad to get out of surgery & I was trying to find an outlet

Posted 2011-10-14T03:26:58+02:00
My girlfriend just told me she was going to break up with me if I didn't quit making Linkin Park references. Slightly concerned, but in the end it doesn't even matter

Epic(10)
Comment by Anonymous

Haha, I see what you did there.

Comment by Anonymous

Haha this is f**king hilarious :D

Comment by Anonymous

This...is...GOLD!!!! :D

Posted 2012-08-15T03:54:22+02:00
Every few years I come to the realization that I was such an idiot just a few years ago.

Funny(33)
Posted 2011-11-11T08:46:56+01:00
It doesn't matter where you're from. Somebody died so you could live. Think about that more than once today and thank a Veteran.

Epic(8)
Comment by Anonymous

f**k them all.. hahaha there dead..

Comment by Anonymous

SOMEBODY DIED SO THAT YOU COULD STILL DRIVE A FOSSIL FUEL POWERED VEHICLE AND KEEP PAYING FOR IT TROUGH YOUR NOSE

Comment by Anonymous

And thank you to the makers of MRE's and the lil heater inside that when put in a hole in the desert of Iraq gave me sexual pleasure.

Comment by Anonymous

For the comment who said you can't die by voulenteering at a fucking kitchen... Not with that attitude

Comment by Anonymous

To the long winded comment below...Veterans Day is a day to specifically acknowledge the sacrifice those serving our country have made. There are days set aside for teachers, attorneys, and such that you mentioned. The fact of the matter is that the days set aside for them are not so greatly celebrated as Veterans Day. I served my country over seas in a strange land to keep those who wish to take your freedoms away at bay. I pray to God that we never lose the freedoms we have in America. If it does happen it will be because of those who do not put a high enough price on what it takes to keep them. I appreciate all those who work in this country in all the various jobs that make America so great. Every job is important, but other than law enforcement, no other job has such had so many lose their life in service to others. I did not join the Army for my own good. The pay isn't great and the living conditions pretty much suck but I knew I was part of a much much bigger thing and I proudly endured all of it. Let's lift up our Military today... Veterans Day. We will lift up the teachers, lawyers, secretaries, and such on their given day. All gave some... some gave all!

Comment by Anonymous

Thanks for the people who appreciate a veterans sacrifice for country. If it wasn't for their sacrifices the puusy peace mongers wouldnt be able to complain. The Taliban and other terrorists groups do not care about life and peace. Especially yours you dumbass.

Comment by Anonymous

The difference is you don't put your life on the line dumbass! You can't die by volunteering at a fucking soup kitchen! Thanks to all the Veterans for keeping us safe.

Comment by Anonymous

This gave me goosebumps. Hoorahh

Comment by Anonymous

Contrary to what cynics WRITE and SPEAK and SPREAD, every American is BLESSED, to be represented by OUR BEST

Comment by Anonymous

To the ingnorarmous who wrote that long letter down below... If it weren't for the soldiers fighting for our country's freedom, you wouldn't have be able to write that letter... PERIOD! So... I will thank a SOLDIER today. I will thank everyone else some other time, but not today! HAPPY VETERANS DAY!!!

Comment by Anonymous

great comment below!!!! could not agree more!

Comment by Anonymous

Going to boot camp, being stationed in Belarus, and patrolling with a rifle isn't the only way to "serve our country". There are LOTS of means of not sitting back and enjoying this country's perks without strapping on a weapon. Teachers, civil rights leaders and attorneys, people who stand up to injustice, who work in soup kitchens, we have so many that sit back and enjoy the perks of this country but don't believe in serving in the military. Why do we associate "serving our country" with the Army, Navy, Air Force, Marines, or Coast Guard? Why not delivering mail in a hailstorm, or teaching kids in the ghetto, or giving free swimming lessons to those who can't afford it, or manning a remote lighthouse on the rocks of the Atlantic, or joining the Peace Corp, or Amigos de las Americas, or offering immigrants free language lessons, or by charging a lower rate to those who need it, over and over, or donating clothes, time, food...? There are so MANY ways to support our country, our freedoms and our rights WITHOUT brandishing a weapon, or by "defending" our country by killing tens of thousands of civilians. The military is a necessary evil. It likely always will be. But, it doesn't need to be 6 times the size of China's, or 10 times the budgets of England, France, Russia, Japan, Germany....that's nuts. To think otherwise, well, you've drunk the Kool-Aid. What rational human being would accept ANY industry where one company pays almost 1/2 of the budget and the rest of the world the other half?? If we had that much oil, we'd be golden. If we had 43% of Earth's ANYTHING, we'd be pretty well set. Well, except of 43% of a massive, massive, massive, bill. Service is service. Doesn't need to be part of the killing machine.

Comment by Anonymous

Who are the f**ktard commie bastards that gave this status a thumbs down. Eat a gangrene cock and die you pieces of shit!

Posted by Suthernfukr 2011-10-12T17:51:47+02:00
Your call is very important to us. Please enjoy this 40 minute flute solo.

Funny(15)
Comment by Anonymous

How could you not get this?

Comment by Anonymous

this really didnt need any explanation to the kid thats never used the phone to actually make a phone call...

Comment by Anonymous

It's making fun of holding music ppl have to listen to when they are on hold

Comment by Anonymous

I don't get it :(

Comment by Anonymous

Thanks! Got a lot of likes on this!

Posted 2010-10-10T22:00:34+02:00
The worst feeling isn't being lonely. It's being forgotten by someone you'd never forget.

Epic(23)
Posted 2013-05-06T22:52:26+02:00
My roommate is on a date and said he's convinced she's coming home with him tonight. I've covered his room in Justin Bieber posters. Now we wait.

Epic(9)
Comment by Anonymous

Should've covered it in 1d posters,,,,,


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