Stalked on 01/23/2013 @ 2:22am
If people rode their spouses like they did their brakes the divorce rate would drop drastically.

Funny(7)
Comment by Anonymous

please write some thing more funny thanks

Stalked on 01/22/2013 @ 9:20pm
I say haha. He says lol. It'll never work.

Funny(6)
Stalked on 01/15/2013 @ 2:34am
If there's one person that could persuade me to go back to school, it would have to be Shannen Doherty. Good call, Education Connection.

Funny(4)
Stalked on 07/11/2012 @ 5:16am
If the workouts you're talking about aren't the bedroom variety no one wants to hear about it.

Epic(2)
Stalked on 07/04/2012 @ 8:50pm
Happy National hear fireworks all day and night set off by Drunk People you wouldn't trust with a Glo-Stick Day!!!

Funny(3)
Comment by Anonymous

V whats your point fucktard??

Comment by Anonymous

Stole that shit from an e-card hahah

Stalked on 06/27/2012 @ 5:11pm
Canada is located right next to the country with all the guns and bombs. Of course Canadians are polite.

Funny(4)
Comment by Anonymous

Maybe we should stop coming in to your work and spending money. Maybe when your broke, unemployed ass is sitting on the curb, you'll realize we aren't so bad.

Comment by Anonymous

If having free health care and a strong economy makes me a stuck up bastard then please hold while not a single fuck is given!!

Comment by Anonymous

God I love being Canadian!!

Comment by Anonymous

I just bought a 800,000 dollar house go Canada !!!!

Comment by Anonymous

And they're healthcare is better, they're economy is better.. Damn stuck-up bastards

Comment by Anonymous

canadians are far from polite i get those dicks comin into work every day, always actiung like we americans owe them somethin! stuck-up bastards

Comment by Anonymous

Good point lol. Those pussies

Stalked on 06/21/2012 @ 9:19pm
My gf just called me a douche. I was so shocked that my sunglasses fell off the back of my head. Luckily they fell in my popped collar.

Funny(3)
Stalked on 06/21/2012 @ 5:50am
You read about all these terrorists--most of them came here legally, but they hung around on these expired visas, some for as long as 10-15 years. Now, compare that to Blockbuster; you are two days late with a video and those people are all over you. Let's put Blockbuster in charge of immigration.

Funny(2)
Comment by Anonymous

VVV funnier than the origional status..

Comment by Anonymous

my local blockbuster changed its name to a "building for rent".......

Comment by Anonymous

oh yeah this makes perfect sence.. dumb ass

Comment by Anonymous

Who's Blockbuster? lol

Stalked on 06/13/2012 @ 8:43am
I have Big Boobs, I am amazing at Call of Duty, and I can make a really good sandwich, Unfortunately I am a guy...

Funny(6)
Comment by Anonymous

HAVENT HEARD THIS ONE BEFORE>............................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................

Comment by Anonymous

New to me and it's FUNNY!

Comment by Anonymous

VVVVVvvvvv its called "status stalker" dumbass....there are going to be old statuses idiot....dont get mad cause the status you posted got thumbed down you prick !

Comment by Anonymous

You have gyno? Ew.... gross.

Stalked on 06/12/2012 @ 10:06pm
written on a bathroom stall door: "HEY! I saw you take that poo, put it back!"

Get a Life(2)
Stalked on 06/12/2012 @ 9:10pm
You're smug, conceited, arrogant, insolent, insufferable... In other words, I find you very attractive.

-1(0)
Comment by Anonymous

some one was put in the friend zone

Comment by Anonymous

Or a nice, polite male who has watched EVERY SINGLE female he knows and cares about gravitate towards those assholes...

Comment by Anonymous

Bet this was posted by a female

Stalked on 06/12/2012 @ 6:36am
Thanks for the thought BING, but i prefer my searches not be social.

Random(1)
Stalked on 06/12/2012 @ 1:14am
REAL men cried when Andy went to college in Toy Story 3

Epic(2)
Comment by Anonymous

Who wants to play doctor?

Comment by Anonymous

oh stfu grown ass ppl watch kids movies too wth is wrong with keepin in touch with your inner child? wantna play with some leggos? lol

Comment by Anonymous

Not sure if a real man has ever watched that movie. Shits for kids

Stalked on 06/11/2012 @ 9:29pm
BREAKING: Apple Excites Tech World with Expensive and Unnecessary New Products

Funny(1)
Stalked on 05/17/2012 @ 5:56pm
Within 10 years, women will comprise over half the workforce. When it happens I can't wait for daytime talk shows to start being geared more towards unemployed men. "Coming up next, we'll get some tips on how to seem showered without actually having to and after that Dr. Steve will explain why your balls will sometimes start moving on their own when you sit on the couch!"

Get a Life(5)
Comment by Anonymous

Fuck this shit just let me put my dick inside..

Comment by Dilligaf13

Blonde. V V V V

Comment by Anonymous

I don't get it

Comment by Anonymous

Mine mo e to the rhythm of the beat!

Comment by Anonymous

I've always noticed they withdrawl inside me when I'm watching scary movies or in the cold.

Comment by Anonymous

Dont act like youve never wanted to know why they move like that

Comment by Anonymous

My balls start moving cause your mama's tonguing them.

Stalked on 05/17/2012 @ 1:43pm
I was on a plane today. The stewardess said, "would you like some headphones?" I said, "sure, but how did you know my name was Phones?"

Funny(4)
Comment by Anonymous

gettin some head

Comment by Leah6666

you wish dude. 1st u need to have a dick if you want it sucked. 2nd, if you did, I'd chop it off .

Comment by Anonymous

I think this is hilarious because on my flight last night, the stewardess' name was Leah and she actually did give me head and swallowed my load. Thanks !!!!

Comment by Anonymous

Man...this seriously made me "lol"!

Comment by Anonymous

haha! i hope you didn't get slapped in the face

Comment by Anonymous

haha you wish!

Stalked on 05/17/2012 @ 3:44am
Admit it, at some point in time you've tried to see if you had superpowers.

Funny(4)
Stalked on 05/17/2012 @ 3:37am
I'm more worn out than a cucumber in a convent...

Funny(2)
Stalked on 05/17/2012 @ 1:16am
When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.

Epic(1)
Stalked on 05/16/2012 @ 3:32pm
Why do men have a hole in their penis?So oxygen can get to their brains.

Get a Life(8)
Comment by Anonymous

V Who or what taught you how to talk like that? Because they're a embarrassment to you and the population.

Comment by Anonymous

fuck your girl in my new wip now her pussy got the new car smell

Comment by Anonymous

Ha ha ha this is so funny you all know this is for fun just relax

Comment by Anonymous

Why do women have cunts? So men will talk to them.

Comment by Mostdopee

its for the money shot.. hahahah

Comment by Anonymous

So apparently no one can take joke.. lol to all the losers who have no life and comments nasty things about JOKE.

Comment by Anonymous

It's for the money shot...here...let me show you.

Comment by Anonymous

That's were women are suppose to preform CPR : )

Comment by Anonymous

so they can be open minded. duh!

Comment by Anonymous

I thought men enjoyed putting their faces in chum buckets and getting all stinky.

Comment by Anonymous

yeah, this is stupid. the hole is actually so men can PISS, you stupid ass bitch.

Comment by Anonymous

You should never surf with a woman, a shark can smell blood from a mile away and women bleed 3 months out of the year, their cunts are like ready serve chum buckets, no wonder soul surfer only had one arm

Comment by Anonymous

I guess we now know then why you have a hole in your vagina...

Comment by Anonymous

girls are really stupid

Comment by Anonymous

Alisa your starting to remind us of that whore Leah6666 dont be like that girl.. lol

Comment by Anonymous

that was fuken retarded

Comment by Anonymous

Nope, so they can pee

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