Stalked on 05/17/2012 @ 3:11am
If I'd known our TV viewing habits were so incompatible, I never would have let things go so far.
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Stalked on 12/13/2010 @ 12:44pm
I replaced all the songs on my GF's Ipod with techno Christmas songs. She has called me at least 12 times. She's super pissed.
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Stalked on 12/10/2010 @ 10:32pm
Going to learn CPR today! One step closer to being a superhero!
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Stalked on 11/16/2010 @ 1:36pm
Waldo probably hides because he's behind on his child support payments.
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Stalked on 11/06/2010 @ 7:18am
You know that public education is failing when high school seniors think London is its own country
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Stalked on 11/05/2010 @ 11:34pm
Immediately updating your relationship status on Facebook after a fight for the 10th time this week is annoying, cut it out.
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Stalked on 11/04/2010 @ 11:21pm
Someone from Facebook Design should write about why they made the news feed font smaller. I just want to understand why.
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Stalked on 10/29/2010 @ 8:26am
If love is a battlefield than my bedroom is Switzerland.
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Stalked on 10/28/2010 @ 8:19pm
just read that burglars use Facebook to see when people aren't home. So from now on, I'm at home. With a rifle. And a hungry crocodile
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Stalked on 10/28/2010 @ 9:30am
The world's gross. Stop rubbing your eyes
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Stalked on 08/23/2010 @ 2:26pm
The only thing I hate about having a phone is when people call.
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Stalked on 08/23/2010 @ 8:11am
Dear reply-to-all sender, we obviously have a mutual friend here and even though I've never met you, I hate you already.
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Stalked on 08/23/2010 @ 7:50am
I have an iphone, I don't need friends.
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Stalked on 08/22/2010 @ 10:12am
I need a GPS that communicates to me in simpler way. For example:
- This way
- That way
- The other right
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Stalked on 08/21/2010 @ 9:53pm
I hope Facebook Places doesn't kill Foursquare. It took me a long time to become mayor of my neighbor's bathtub.
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Stalked on 08/21/2010 @ 6:53pm
"Who's this? I got a new phone" means "I deleted your number because I don't care to talk to you."
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Stalked on 08/21/2010 @ 9:30am
"I just had the most productive several hours of my life! And I owe it all to you, Twitter!!!" Said no one ever.
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Stalked on 08/21/2010 @ 8:52am
whats this bullshit that pandora is telling me that ive gone over my free music listening privileges for the month and now I have to pay a fee to listen some more?!?! this is America! And in America, Pandora should be free no matter how much you use it!
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Stalked on 08/20/2010 @ 12:32pm
I think this person in the bank drive thru in front of me is refinancing their mortgage.
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Stalked on 08/20/2010 @ 11:25am
This internet has shitty reception.
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1st World Problems Status Updates Most of us live in a country where we have a thing called 1st world problems meaning that other countries have serious problems where we have 1st world problems. Dreading going to the dentist is an example of a 1st world problem, hey at least you still have teeth! Here is a collection of funny life problems that typically only people in 1st world countries face.
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Facebook Addict Intervention Parody
VIDEO
To who ever posted this that is flippin amazing! I could not stop laughing at that, I think I shall add this to my arsenal of tricks