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Posted 2011-03-01T03:38:19+01:00
Those of you who think you know everything are annoying those of us who do.

Funny(4)
2590
Posted 2011-03-01T03:34:56+01:00
I would agree with you, but then we'd both be wrong.

Epic(5)
3760
Posted 2011-03-01T01:37:35+01:00
Sometimes I feel like only Google understands what I'm trying to say...

Funny(6)
5420
Posted 2011-02-28T23:23:10+01:00
Just joined a large group to teach me to be more of an individual..

Funny(4)
1860
Posted 2011-02-28T22:42:30+01:00
Life crisis brought on by the internet: I have to scroll down pretty far to enter my year of birth

Funny(3)
3150
Posted 2011-02-28T22:39:44+01:00
Dear tongue, can't touch this. Love, Elbow.

Funny(7)
48102
Comment by Anonymous

YOU'RE Old

Comment by Anonymous

Old.

Posted 2011-02-28T22:37:56+01:00
we all know "watch a movie" means "I wanna be in the dark with you"

Funny(4)
5280
Posted 2011-02-28T22:07:05+01:00
The Oscars are a bad SNL with trophies.

Epic(2)
19110
Posted 2011-02-28T22:06:37+01:00
Charlie Sheen just tested negative for all drugs. However, all drugs tested positive for Charlie Sheen.

Funny(6)
35170
Posted 2011-02-28T22:06:05+01:00
As kids we want to be adults who can do whatever they want and as adults we wish we were kids who can do whatever they want

Epic(1)
4740
Posted by Dbo185 2011-02-28T12:38:51+01:00
Liver repair progress= 30% -what a weekend!!

Epic(2)
9250
Posted 2011-02-28T11:24:06+01:00
I'm a lot like a GPS: perfectly capable of telling people where to go and how to get there.

Epic(4)
3280
Posted 2011-02-28T11:23:21+01:00
Ever want to answer every question with a middle finger? That's kinda where I'm at today.

Epic(4)
5580
Posted 2011-02-28T11:21:21+01:00
A new study shows that smart people tend to drink more. But I already knew I'm smarter with alcohol. And chattier. And funnier. And regrettier.

Win(2)
4650
Posted 2011-02-28T06:54:31+01:00
Now I completely understand why Oscar is a grouch.

Funny(4)
2883
Comment by Anonymous

yes lmao

Comment by Anonymous

does this have to do with the academy awards???

Comment by Anonymous

does this have to do with the academy awards???

Posted 2011-02-28T05:21:33+01:00
Telling someone why you love them is like explaining what water tastes like

Funny(3)
6160
Posted 2011-02-28T02:43:37+01:00
My stomach hurts because people keep feeding me bullshit and I'm gonna throw it all up in their faces.

Epic(6)
27290
Posted by Tchangles 2011-02-28T02:19:40+01:00
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce you deleted and blocked. You may now kiss my ass

Funny(21)
1871410
Comment by Anonymous

what's wrong with vainy tits? :/

Comment by Anonymous

OLD and nobody uses the correct English. The word you're looking for is "vested", not "invested". Vested means that you hold the authority to do something.

Comment by Anonymous

this is so funny and for all you hatters.. find something else to hate on <3

Comment by Anonymous

that was pretty freakin hilarious i havent heard it yet... so go suck a vainy one. <3

Comment by Anonymous

Yeah, douche!

Comment by Anonymous

It's not old to all of us... this is my first time hearing it

Comment by Anonymous

Thank you at tizzle! ...I don't want to post OLD jokes!

Comment by At Tizzle

The joke is old! Post it on your fb if you want, but don't be surprised when someone tells you the same thing.

Comment by Anonymous

Is the joke old? maybe it's just you Jackass!

Comment by At Tizzle

Old............

Posted by Tchangles 2011-02-28T02:14:24+01:00
If you need a friend (text me) need a laugh (call me) need a hug (stop by) need money (this number is no longer in service)

Funny(7)
7375
Comment by Anonymous

What's with all the "old" crap. The only people who actually care that it's old, are jackasses.

Comment by Anonymous

Thank you for telling us that this is old.................

Comment by Anonymous

Yeah Jackass!

Comment by Anonymous

who cares if it's old you jackass...

Comment by Anonymous

Old

Posted 2011-02-28T01:11:35+01:00
Take your time, think alot. Think of everything you've got. For you will still be here tomorrow, but your dreams may not.

Epic(4)
3491
Comment by Anonymous

Love Cat!!

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