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Posted 2015-02-28T10:26:47+01:00
If you love something, feed it so much that it get's too fat for anyone else to want.

Funny(1)
Posted 2015-02-28T10:03:06+01:00
Movie idea: Freaky Friday2015: Your LinkedIn profile and your Tinder profile accidentally switch places.

Funny(1)
Posted 2015-02-25T06:56:45+01:00
17 year old Kylie Jenner just bought herself a 2.7 million dollar house Anyway...I'm off to Coin Star to see if I can pay rent this month

Funny(2)
Posted 2015-02-25T06:44:34+01:00
People are like snowflakes. If you piss on them they go away.

Funny(1)
Comment by Anonymous

huih??? I pay good money for being pissed on ...

Comment by Anonymous

Ancient, motherfucker!!!!!!!!!

Comment by Anonymous

can we piss on u then?

Posted 2015-02-25T06:43:53+01:00
Ironically the only way I'd watch the 50 Shades of Grey movie is if you tied me to a chair and forced me to.

Funny(3)
Comment by Anonymous

u suck cock and eat cum.stupid idiot

Comment by Anonymous

You know you missed me. : )

Comment by Anonymous

Ah the squeaker is back. Your mom finally let you have interweb access again. Oh joy.

Comment by Anonymous

Been gone 5 months and I come back and I see not one person has posted a funny joke. Oh well, back to making fun on all the comments... ; P

Posted 2015-02-24T04:52:33+01:00
Good mothers let you lick the beaters when they're making a cake. Great mothers turn the mixer off first.

Funny(1)
Comment by Anonymous

Fantastic mothers let you lick their pussy.

Posted 2015-02-23T23:38:56+01:00
Can you imagine parents nowadays explaining to their kids how they met? "Well, it all started one day when your dad 'liked' one of my selfies."

Funny(2)
Comment by Anonymous

I imagine it would be far easier to do so than explaining to the child that they had a brother or sister that their mommy drowned in the tub for writing such lame shit.

Posted 2015-02-22T06:14:39+01:00
Washington is on the $1 bill because he was the 1st president. Ben Franklin is on the $100 because he was a baller that went to sex parties

Funny(2)
Comment by Anonymous

And your mom is on wooden nickels because she's such a cheap whore, that she'll even fuck for fake money.

Posted 2015-02-22T04:56:00+01:00
Bowser is a job creator and the largest employer in the mushroom kingdom

Funny(1)
Comment by Anonymous

I thought your mom was the largest employer in the mushroom kingdom? Oh, wrong kind of mushrooms?

Posted 2015-02-21T08:53:57+01:00
Male or female, no one fucks with you if you put your lipstick on like The Joker.

Funny(1)
Posted 2015-02-21T01:44:38+01:00
Do the children of porn stars make tapes of themselves working in a cubical to get back at their parents?

Funny(4)
Posted 2015-02-20T19:26:00+01:00
Stop. Collabarate. And listen. Vanialla Ice just stole your kitchen.

Funny(2)
Comment by Anonymous

* Collaborate, *Vanilla

Comment by Anonymous

This Made me REALLY Laugh out loud !

Posted 2015-02-19T06:38:11+01:00
Sorry about all the typos lately, gays.

Funny(4)
Comment by Anonymous

*Expert cocksucker, you troll

Comment by Anonymous

V Thanks for taking the bait and proving my point cocksucker! LOL I knew there would be one stupid enough to fall for it.

Comment by Anonymous

Well they are the ones known for being grammer nazis..

Posted 2015-02-19T06:33:33+01:00
Down on yourself for being lazy? Keep in mind the Greeks believed their GODS lived atop a very hikeable mountain and no one went to check.

Funny(4)
Comment by Anonymous

Well, I haven't been to Miramichi, but St. John? Yep. And in the last 4 months, EH

Posted 2015-02-19T06:32:11+01:00
I bet giraffes don't even know what farts smell like.

Funny(4)
Comment by Anonymous

There own fart. They can bend down to smell others.

Posted 2015-02-19T06:02:33+01:00
Phone autocorrected 'finger' to 'fist.' Drastically changed the tone of that sext.

Funny(4)
Posted 2015-02-19T05:55:06+01:00
YOU KNEW HOW I CHEWED WHEN YOU MARRIED ME

Funny(2)
Comment by Anonymous

Screamo Ryan Pinkleton my favorite is song. BEAT THAT CENSAAuuhS

Posted 2015-02-19T05:54:35+01:00
I'm about to eat gas station breakfast. Tell my family that I love them.

Funny(1)
Comment by Anonymous

They don't care, that's why they left you there.

Comment by Anonymous

Why don't you 2 get a room and leave us out.

Comment by Anonymous

The guy who commented, "Bossier" on the status 7 below is the Bolivar guy. Come to his place if you so will. >>>>>>> RANDOMETERRRRR Satii generatorrrrr * mike mike *

Comment by Anonymous

The guy who commented, "Bossier" on the status 7 below is the Bolivar guy. Come to his place if you so will. >>>>>>> RANDOMETERRRRR Satii generatorrrrr * mike mike *

Posted 2015-02-19T05:54:18+01:00
No one looks more depressed than a grown man walking away from the microwave with a Lean Cuisine meal in his hands.

Funny(2)
Posted 2015-02-16T20:50:47+01:00
I celebrate President's Day by doing something that looks like a good idea and then regretting it for the next 4 years

Funny(4)
Comment by Anonymous

The dumb fucks around here V sure are getting dumber.

Comment by Anonymous

Hey, meester Bossier, City. Enjoy ya stay in my REALMMMM


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