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Posted 2011-01-15T03:55:32+01:00
No matter what i get on the internet for, I always end up on facebook

Epic(2)
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Posted 2011-01-15T02:04:04+01:00
It's payday which means only 2 more weeks until I have money again for a few hours.

Epic(2)
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Comment by Twystafate

so true. This is funny b/c we can see ourselves doing the same thing bills, bills, bills!!

Posted 2011-01-15T02:02:54+01:00
Don't make the same typo I did in a text to my girlfriend: "Having a great time wish you were her."

Epic(12)
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Comment by Anonymous

Pubes...

Comment by Missmorgan

That is AWESOME!!! :)

Posted 2011-01-14T20:15:22+01:00
Quick! What's the world record for longest turd? I don't want to bag and tag this baby for nothing.

Epic(4)
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Posted 2011-01-14T18:18:43+01:00
If hooters changes to a door-to-door service, would they change thier name to knockers?

Epic(4)
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Posted 2011-01-14T07:46:47+01:00
astrologists probably shouldve kept the the new signs thing a secret cuz facebook might implode with girls complaining about it

Epic(2)
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Posted 2011-01-14T06:49:40+01:00
I wish dogs wouldn't get so angry at me for walking by their fences

Epic(1)
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Posted 2011-01-14T06:01:25+01:00
You know your ego is too big when it enters the room before you do.

Epic(1)
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Posted 2011-01-13T20:35:13+01:00
Remember the bridge you drive over today was built by the lowest bidder.

Epic(4)
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Posted 2011-01-13T19:18:01+01:00
note to self: don't set your password reminder as "you should know this"

Epic(3)
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Posted 2011-01-13T18:30:39+01:00
Stop using "that is all" at the end of your posts. That is all.

Epic(1)
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Posted 2011-01-13T18:15:37+01:00
I may not be perfect, but I'm always me, and that's something you could never be.

Epic(2)
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Posted by Natelile 2011-01-13T08:30:01+01:00
Note to self: "Bring sexy back"

Epic(2)
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Comment by Anonymous

ur the reason sexy left =P

Comment by Natelile

Lol Bote the comment beneath me "my ego persuades me to be aot more confident than i should be" fits me perfectly oh just so ya know the computer wuldnt let me space my name that my first and last Nate Lile... that is all

Comment by Anonymous

Here's hoping you could actually do it, Natelile...

Posted 2011-01-13T02:01:54+01:00
I wish all of life's decisions were as simple as going to Denny's when you're shitfaced.

Epic(3)
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Posted 2011-01-12T20:12:27+01:00
When I'm rich, I'm going to dictate my status updates to my secretary, and my butler will press the share button.

Epic(6)
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Posted 2011-01-12T20:10:20+01:00
MySpace is the fannypack of the internet.

Epic(3)
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Posted 2011-01-12T20:00:14+01:00
Sarah Palin can see China from the hole she's digging.

Epic(10)
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Posted by Snotty 2011-01-12T17:49:50+01:00
A new study found that ESP could actually be real. I read about it in tomorrow’s paper.

Epic(3)
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Posted 2011-01-12T14:51:11+01:00
I wanted to try out my Spanish skills, so why not the Spanish version of instructions at the ATM, but then I was like- what if it gives me pesos?

Epic(8)
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Posted 2011-01-12T01:45:04+01:00
I cheated on my fears, broke up with my doubts, got engaged to my faith and now I'm marrying my dreams

Epic(11)
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Total Number of Statuses:4780

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