Funny Epic Win Get A Life Fail Share
Those who cast the votes decide nothing. Those who count the votes decide everything.
Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.
if you are reading this status between 7AM and 5 PM--Get a Job!! OR-- Get back to WORK!!
Who is wise? He that learns from everyone. Who is powerful? He that governs his passions. Who is rich? He that is content. Who is that? Nobody.
Now that you really think about it, you've never seen me and Batman in the same room have you?
Taco Bell would make millions if they would deliver!
Facebook etiquette: Thou shall not hold a conversation under someone's status post.
Impossible is just a fancy way of saying "no on else has figured out a way to do this yet"
Walmart is so much fun for all the wrong reasons.
My neighbor knocked on my door at three in the morning! Can you believe that? Lucky for him I was still up playing my drums.
I wish my phone auto-corrected my life
Nothing to some, is everything.
Another mass bird death except this time it's a whole flock of Seahawks in Chicago.
What you do speaks so loud that I can't hear anything you say
Just saw that the new zodiac sign is Ophiuchus. Well played Oprah, well played..
When something bad happens you have three choices. You can either let it destroy you, do something about it, or not give a damn.
thinks doctors should recommend the iPhone for constipation
Waking up and thinking it's a work day then realizing it's Saturday, is one of the best feelings ever!
When something bad happens you have three choices. You can either let it define you, let it destroy you, or you can let it strengthen you
At what age do you stop listening to new music and just play the same 15 songs over and over again?
Total Number of Statuses:4782
Epic Statuses Not everything is Epic, but these statuses are! These legendary statuses will be remembered and used over and over again until the end of time, probably. If you think you have an epic status submit it now!
Facebook Addict Intervention Parody