Its like all the people I knew from highschool but never stayed friends with invade my news feed with round the clock updates about how there still worthless piles of shit. Turns out "thug life" doesn't pan out for most white kids.
Makes no sense without speaking correctly, and then it's not funny. FAIL
Posted 2012-05-18T02:53:24-07:00
A man and his wife were awakened at 3:00 am by a loud pounding on the door. The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push. 'Not a chance,' says the husband, 'it is 3:00 in the morning!'He slams the door and returns to bed. 'Who was that?' asked his wife. 'Just some drunk guy asking for a push,' he answers. 'Did you help him?' she asks. 'No, I did not, it is 3:00 in the morning and it is pouring rain out there!''Well, you have a short memory,' says his wife. 'Can't you remember about three months ago when we broke down, and those two guys helped us? I think you should help him, and you should be ashamed of yourself!' The man does as he is told, gets dressed, and goes out into the pounding rain. He calls out into the dark, 'Hello, are you still there?' 'Yes,' comes back the answer. 'Do you still need a push?' calls out the husband. 'Yes, please!' comes the reply from the dark. 'Where are you?' asks the husband. 'Over here on the swing,' replied the drunk.
Omg.... Such waste of time. I an not believe it!
And honestly.... This I the first time ever that I am leaving a negative comment.
I never thought I would do it....
But this thing.... It was waaaaaaayyy toooo long but I kept thinking that something great and really funny will come out of it. I'm still waiting for that.... It never happened. It never will.
Within 10 years, women will comprise over half the workforce. When it happens I can't wait for daytime talk shows to start being geared more towards unemployed men. "Coming up next, we'll get some tips on how to seem showered without actually having to and after that Dr. Steve will explain why your balls will sometimes start moving on their own when you sit on the couch!"
To the moron below: It's status stalker you idiot! Why should they change it? Do you even know how dumb you sound writing any of that...this whole site exist so people can steal a status duhhhh GET WITH IT!
I think this is hilarious because on my flight last night, the stewardess' name was Leah and she actually did give me head and swallowed my load. Thanks !!!!
Will be having a party this weekend!!!!! Stay tuned for more details. If you're not invited, its because you have been deemed incapable of being around high levels of greatness.
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*sent from a Desk Computer while driving.. like a Boss