Funny Epic Win Get A Life Fail Share
First world problems: I couldn't hear the TV so I had to stop eating chips.
"I don't watch TV" proudly says a person who spends 8 hours a day on the internet.
It's time to admit that as a species, we are just not ready for 4-way stops
Have you tried insulting each other until the romance comes back?
You never bring your mouth to a banana. Bring the banana to your mouth.
Do people who exercise not know about ice cream and Netflix?
Some people say I'm narcissistic. Anyway, enough about them.
Your message was sent, received, seen, ignored, screen captured, sent to friends and ridiculed.
Love is telling someone to go to hell and worrying about them getting there safely.
Thought I saw my ex walking down the street but she wasn't busy sucking someone else's cock so it probably wasn't her.
Don't you love being the last one to find out but the first one to not give a fuck
If God is a woman then how do you explain:
2) Shoes you can't afford
Super stoked to see the new boulders I assume my upstairs neighbors are rolling around in their apartment.
Internet: you've made a compelling argument. Sleep: present your case.
Everyone wants to have sex, sluts are just successful. That's why we hate them.
Relationships are an expensive way to watch someone slowly like you less and less.
I have the world's best opinions.
Remember, every six cats equals one boyfriend.
You're not important enough to have haters. You just have a few people who notice you're an asshole.
If I were Noah, I'd be like, fuck the earth I'm gonna keep this boat full of animals and pet them forever.
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